當你作書面回饋時要委婉些

在一個理想的世界裏，回饋總是會發生在面對面上，所以另一個人可以閱讀到你的肢體語言並聽到你的聲音。但有時你必須通過電子郵件、簡訊或即時消息來提供回饋，在這些情况下，注意文字的調門是很重要的。

書面責備很容易導致誤解，因為它失去了天生的同情心，來自於與人交談。一旦它被打字了，比口頭評論更難收回。

一般來說，你的書面回饋應該堅持描述性的，而不是評估性的語言。人們通常更容易接受，例如“這就是我所看到的”，而不是“我認為你應該這樣做”。後者可以被視為苛刻和漠不關心，而前者更客觀。

如果你與接收者有很緊密的關係，你會有更多的自由度，因為這個人不太可能認為你的責備是一種攻擊。儘管如此，你通過思考和說出來的額外努力會幫助人們真正理解到到你的資訊（即使他們是以閱讀來接收資訊）。

Be Tactful When You Provide Feedback in Writing

In an ideal world, feedback would always happen face-to-face, so the other person could read your body language and hear your voice. But there are times when you have to provide input through email, text message, or even instant message, and in these cases it’s important to be careful about tone.

Written criticism can easily lead to misunderstandings, since it’s missing the natural empathy that comes from talking to someone in person. And once it’s typed, it’s harder to take back than a spoken comment.

Generally, your written feedback should stick to descriptive, rather than evaluative, language. People are usually more receptive to, for example, “This is what I see happening” than to “This is what I think you should do differently.” The latter can be read as harsh and uncaring, whereas the former is more objective.

You’ll have more latitude if you have a strong relationship with the recipient, because the person is less likely to perceive the criticism as an attack. Still, the extra effort you put into thinking through what to say and how to say it will help the person hear your message (even if they’re reading it).

耐心、開放地解决拔河戰爭

如果你和一個同事正在為誰擁有一個項目或誰來决定如何使用你的團隊預算而爭執不休，你可能會感到沮喪或受到威脅。但是生氣不會幫助你達成一個決議。

忘掉贏或輸的模式；通過關注共同目標來完成任務。

試著向別人展示你是開放的，你想要什麼對組織是最好的（並確保這是真的）。不要認為同事是你的死敵，這可能是錯誤誘導。

他們多半不會真的要和你起衝突，優勢人們只是必須虛張聲勢。如果你們兩個想不出前進的方向，請老闆參與進來。

最重要的是要有耐心。解决拔河問題可能需要一些時間，所以不要試圖強迫決議。

Resolve a Turf War by Being Patient and Open-Minded

If you and a colleague are in a tug-of-war over who owns a project or who gets to decide how to use your team’s budget, you might feel frustrated or threatened. But getting angry won’t help you reach a resolution.

Forget the win-lose paradigm; approach the situation by focusing on a common goal.

Try to show the other person that you’re open-minded and that you want what’s best for the organization (and make sure that’s true). And don’t think of the colleague as your mortal enemy, tempting as that may be.

Chances are they aren’t out to get you — sometimes people’s responsibilities simply conflict. Ask your boss to step in if the two of you can’t figure out a way forward.

Most important, be patient. Addressing the tug-of-war is likely going to take some time, so don’t try to force a resolution.

新的領導者，仔細考慮你說的是什麼任務

新的領導者常常被誘惑去從事那些讓他們接近團隊日常運作的工作。但是現在你有了更廣泛的責任，你需要瞭解你的時間和你所承擔的任務的選擇性。

仔細評估對你的每一個請求，並詢問它是否與你的最高價值貢獻相一致。對於那些利用你的特殊才能的請求，說“是”，並安排出必要的時間和注意力。對於那些和你的優先次序不符合但很重要的項目，在你的團隊裏找出其他人來負責支持：“是的，我們可以做到這一點，但是我隊裡的老張將是主要的連絡人。”

你仍然可以諮詢、激勵和領導你的團隊的工作——但是你應該是一個潤滑劑，而不是做重擔的人。

New Leaders, Be Thoughtful About What Tasks You Say Yes To

New managers are often tempted to hold onto the work that keeps them close to their team’s everyday operations. But now that you have a wider set of responsibilities, you need to be discerning about your time and selective about the tasks you take on.

Carefully assess every demand that comes your way, and ask whether it aligns with your highest-value contributions. To those requests that draw on your particular talents, say yes and carve out the necessary time and attention. To those that don’t align but are important, identify other people on your team who can take them on: “Yes, we can do that, but Mr. Zhang on my team will be the main contact.”

You can still consult on, motivate, and lead your team’s work — but you should be a catalyst, not the one doing the heavy lifting.